New Nerd Talk!!! Nerd Talk is where some of the Nerds here at SWN answer questions from you, the fans, about Nerd culture. In this Nerd Talk we dream up our versions of the Suicide Squad. Also check out our last Nerd Talk HERE where we talk about “What brings out our nerd rage?” If you didn’t know we do a podcast called SomewhatNerdy Radio and on the latest one we review the Suicide Squad movie and talk about some famous anti-heroes. Its really just a Nerd Talk in a podcast form and if you use iTunes you can subscribe right HERE or just hit the podcast tab at the top of this page. Thanks for reading and if you got a question to ask the Nerds you can email us at SomewhatNerdyRadio@Gmail.com and make sure to comment with your own answers in the comment section below or on the FB page HERE.
The focus for this month’s Nerd Talk was to create our own Suicide Squad. I know some of my fellow NERDs went out of the DC Universe, but I chose to stay within that parameter. Who would I but on my team, hmmmm, they would have to be able to destroy the Justice League if need be so let’s see who I think could accomplish that goal. First of all, I would choose a Red lantern, Bleez to be precise. Not only is she a bad ass, once her rage is at its maximum level, even Superman would have some issues keeping her down. My next choice would be Deathstorm. Why? because he can change the molecular structure of anything, even the heroes. Next on my list would be Deathstroke. Don’t get me wrong, Deadshot is good, but Slade is better. My fourth member would be Cyborg Superman simply cause he can do it all with or without a power ring. Next, I would add the Reverse Flash in case we need the power to turn back time. I also feel that the team needs another killer female agent so how about Killer Frost? I have two more spots to feel and one of them is for the insane. That’s right folks, I choose the Creeper to join the team. With this bunch of mischievous criminals and warriors running rampant, who could lead this team? Well, that is where my last choice comes in. He is truly one of a kind and if anyone got out of line, I know he could put them down. My choice for team leader of my squad is…LOBO! There you have it folks. If I was the creator or a writer for DC’s the Suicide Squad, this is the team for me.
When the question was asked, “If you could make your own Suicide Squad, who would make the team?” I knew straight away that I was going to not use comic characters, I was going to build my team based on my love for wrestling. I’ve had wrestlers past and present running through my head but I’ve decided that instead of just using legends of the squared circle I’m going to limit myself to current wrestlers only so here it goes:
Well you need strength and intimidation so who else fits that role but the ‘Beast Incarnate’ Brock Lesnar. He’s the best choice, he’s so frightening and that would work in my team’s favour.
Filling the ‘Harley Quinn’ role in my squad is the English crazy that is Paige, with her quick wit, looks and kick ass style she fit’s in perfectly.
Now one thing a team like this definitely needs is a daredevil, a risk taker, and there’s no better than the legendary fearless man himself, Jeff Hardy.
Every team needs an Irish ass kicker and there’s no better out there than Finn Balor, he has great speed and grace and has no qualms about kicking your ass! The fact he has a demon alter persona also helps.
When you need a deadly hitter Asuka is definitely the one to call, with her technical style she’ll get the job done when called up on.
What’s a team of renegades without a mouth piece, Enzo Amore is the best talker in the business and the fact he can take a beating and still keep his mouth running is why he can slot in to my team.
Filling in for the ‘Joker’ role here is (in my opinion) the wrestling version of that character and that’s Shinsuke Nakamura, if you’ve ever watched him wrestle you’ll know exactly what I mean.
Candice LeRae may be beautiful to look at but don’t let her looks deceive you, she will kick your ass. Whether you’re a man or a woman it doesn’t matter to her.
Every team needs a badass veteran that still has the intimidation factor, both in presence and in the knowledge o what they’re capable of. My team’s veteran leader is the legendary Undertaker, he fills all the boxes needed for this position.
Everyone saw the trailers for Suicide Squad. That dude gives a hypothetical saying what if Superman came down and ripped open the White House. So lets form a team! Great! The problem is that no one in that team could have any hope for beating Superman. Maaaybe Enchantress but other than that nope nope nope. So who would I pick for my Suicide Squad? People who could get the job done! I’m going to go full nerd on this and pull from my favorite stories.
You need a leader. Someone who can command people but also kick butt when needed. The leader doesn’t need any super powers themselves, they just need to know who to send where. The leader of my team would be “Gentleman” Johnny Marcone fom the Dresden Files. He’s a crime boss in Jim Butcher’s novel and he’s very handy with a gun and throwing knives. He may be just a normal human but he doesn’t even balk and dealing with vampires, ghosts, and even The Fae.
Superman used to be OP as all get out. It wasn’t until later that they started giving him more weaknesses and one of those is magic. In fact, you’ll be hard pressed to find a DC or Marvel hero and villain who isn’t susceptible to magic. That’s why I’m adding Bellatrix Lestrange from the Harry Potter series to my squad. There’s not even an ounce of good in her and she wouldn’t even hesitate to even kill a kid, but if you pop a bomb in her neck she’ll fall in line quickly. She was powerhouse during the Battle of Hogwarts and her biggest mistake was when she came between Molly Weasley and her kids.
Diablo may have been considered a bad guy, but he wasn’t all bad. He had some positive qualities and even a backstory that made him seem human. Killer Croc was the tank of the group who would just rush in to wreck face. So why not combine the two? In the anime Yu Yu Hakusho the younger Toguro brother fits that description perfectly. He may have had a ridiculous looking final form but stupid or not he knocked Yusuke Urameshi around for most of the battle. When the battle ends you learn more about him and it even makes him a tad sympathetic as he takes his punishment with honor. (btw, no spoiler warning because this is a 24 year old manga/anime. You’ve had enough time.)
How about someone who could work as both a fighter in the front lines as well as be a sneaky assassin type? How about someone who can heal themselves but who wouldn’t be able to come back from a blown up head? How about someone like Lady Deathstrike? She can wreck face and also come back from quite a bit of damage thanks to her cybernetic healing factor. She’s a cyborg with an unbreakable skeleton and claws that can tear through most anything.
And lastly, I’ve drawn from books, movies (based on a book), manga/anime, and comics so far so how about a video game? How about one of the most iconic video game villains of all time? How about someone who still gets cosplayed to this day and who makes gamers grip their controllers with sweaty palms? How about Sephiroth? Final Fantasy VIII may be my favorite in the series but Final Fantasy VII had the best bad guy. Sephiroth is the epitome of final boss and someone who could stop a superhero or super villain on a rampage. He’s the hardest battle in not just Final Fantasy VII but in Kingdom Hearts as well.
Actually, let me add one more person. Ambrose Jakis from the Kingkiller Chronicle series. He’s just a normal human with nothing extraordinary about him. Why add him, you may ask? Because I want him to die.
